The Sitter

I've been busy. I took off last week, to use up excess vacation days I've accumulated from working overtime. I had until the end of the month to use them or lose them. And I definitely wasn't going to lose them.

I usually don't use a house sitter, but one of my friends was having a family reunion on his wife's side. He happened to have his brother visiting at the same time. His place was crowded, so I offered up my place for his brother to stay in while I was gone.

My friend and his brother arrived the evening that I was leaving. I gave them a quick tour of the place. And I let them know to call me in case of emergencies. Before I left, the brother asked if there was anything he could do to help out around the place while I was gone.

I said, "Nothing important. But if you have a few minutes, you could look after my plants."

I pointed at the three colorful mixture of flowering plants adorning my living room--a blooming cactus, some vibrant orchids, and some bright yellow mums. I said, "I usually dust them once a week."

The brother raised an eyebrow and said, "You mean water them once a week?"

I said, "No, just dust them with this duster," and pointed out the duster and continued, "These plants are fake, plastic ones. If they get really dusty, I rinse them under the tap and dry them outside."

My friend asked, "Why do you have fake plants?"

I said, "Because they look good and I can't grow plants. Anyway, real or fake, flowers are lovely to look, and they make me happy when I see them in all their wonderful varieties. They are nature's wonders! Just like boobs, real or fake, big or small, I love looking at their glorious shapes and sizes. They are nature's gifts!"

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Be good to your boobs. Check for lumps and bumps and see your healthcare provider for any questions or concerns.