I've been busy this week. And I've been dreading this weekend. It's that time again to go through and purge all the stuff I've accumulated. I'm kind of a pack rat. I can't seem to bring myself to throw things away, especially if they're still working or in good condition. I don't like to waste stuff. I try to reuse them or at least think of a way to re purpose them. Old clothes get donated or recycled into wash rags. Plastic bags from groceries become liners for the small wastebaskets. Newspapers become cleaning rags for glass and mirrors. I save the large oversize big gulp cup from the gas station soda fountain; I wash and reuse it at home. I just fill it up once and it lasts the rest of the meal. I have regular glasses but I use them for company.
I wish I could say that everything I've kept is useful, but the truth is, a lot of it is just useless junk. I have a bunch of magazines and newsletters just piling up in the corner. The boxes that held the appliances I've bought are taking up space in the closets. I have lids for Tupperware long gone and plastic containers that no longer have lids. The same can be said for kitchenware--I've got lids that match no pots and pans that I never use. All of it is taking up space.
So about every three months, I go through my stuff and purge all the junk. It's a lot of work, but it's so worth it. Besides, I hate having clutter all over the place. Still, it's never easy for me to part with some of these things. But I have to remind myself that I don't need it. It's time for a clean break. Speaking of clean breaks, I'm also having to deal with getting rid of someone, someone I used to be friends with a few years ago.
It's never easy breaking up with people. There's really no easy or right way. Once I made the foolish mistake of listening to some female friends. They persuaded me that that I should go over to the girl's apt and break up with her there, face to face, because she would need the comfort of her home and a way to reach out to her friends for support. So like an idiot, I follow their advice, only to end up with a vase tossed at me and a shard that cut two inches along my forearm. I still have the scar. And when I saw my female friends, I told them that was the last time that I ever take any break up advice from them!
I've also been told that honesty is the best policy when it comes to breaking up. Yeah, I don't think so. Once again, it was another female friend who told me this crap. I don't think it's necessary to be honest with someone when you break up with them. Once, I briefly dated a woman who didn't shave her armpits. I tried to be cool about it, because she was really fun. But she had more hair in her underarms than I did. And when we went out dancing one night, she lifted her arms and twirled about. My eyes were drawn to her armpits. She had used a deodorant that left white flakes, and it looked like she had those puffy, white powdered pastries glued to her armpits. It was not a pretty picture. So I broke up with her, telling her that I wasn't ready for anything serious. I sure as hell wasn't going to tell her that her hairy armpits freaked me out. That was my issue; she was fine with her armpit hair. What would be the point of telling the truth? I'd only hurt her more. I maybe a shallow jackass, but I certainly refuse to be complete A-hole.
If I've learned anything from my previous experiences, it's that there's no right way to break up with someone--and I may need to stop listening to my female friends, or get some wiser ones. So now, my current method of breaking up with people is to just cut off complete communication--no phone calls, no letters, no showing up at the same places. It's cold, but I still haven't figured out a way to break up with people without anyone getting hurt--especially me!
It's worked very well with people that I don't like. If you can't say anything nice about someone, then don't say anything at all. Most of them get the hint. Except this ex friend who keeps calling me, leaving me text messages--none of them have been returned or acknowledged. I'm hoping she'll eventually get the hint that I really don't want her in my life. If there's an easier way to break up, I still haven't found it. I'm cleaning house this weekend, getting rid of the mess and stress in my home. I'm doing the the same in my personal life.